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I am not a label.........I am a living, breathing, ever-expansive, beautiful and loving soul. I am a faith-believing, Christ-centered individual. I do believe that the Bible is a book of journies that those who walked before us left for us to see what they experienced and to learn from them. They are words inspired by God, given to the author of each book. I believe that even today God gives inspired words to be written for others to learn, grow and lead by examples. As long as we live under a label we will be ruled by that label. Believe in yourself as an individual "being" not what you do, not your goals, not your expectations......ju st a living being.
Jesus made some pretty strong statements for us lo learn and lead by example. There are two very powerful and impacting ones that I, personally try to live by.....however, it took me years to truly begin to walk it. 1. Love the Lord your God, 2. Love others as you love yourself. These were hard because when I was buried in guilt, fear, desparation, shame......and the list can go on and on......how can I love others because I surely don't love myself. We learn from history, our ancestors, pastors, friends, those we feel and see as mentors. When we begin to believe and NOT give faith to ourselves in learning and growing we will only be an extention of them and what they were. Therefore we are not an individual. I am not a label.......I am a living, breathing, ever-expansive, beautiful and loving soul.
This is one of the songs that has been written for the purpose of the journey that portrays the boldness of this lesbian musican, Tandy Bowman, sharing one of her orginal compositions.
For Such A Time As This
I'm looking Lord to know who I am
tryin' to figure out just where I stand
searching for answers who knows if I'll find
Do you know who I am?
I'm the outcast the church has turned away
I'm the neighbor you'd rather not stay
I'm the one you buried in their shame
Did you ever stop to think?
For such a time as this
acceptance must be shown
for such a time as this
the Love of God must be known
We are everyday people
and you do know our names
we choose to stay hidden
because of your spiritual games
We share our faith and we share our love
we worship the same God and long for Heaven above
Jesus died for us just as He did for you
if it were not so the Word would not be true
For such a time as this
acceptance must be shown
for such a time as this
the world must know
The following is a poem that shares the feelings of awareness, that has been part of this journey.
Torn ~ Broken ~ Alive
Blinded by the light the truth can not be heard
The shattering, the torn, the reaping, the tongue lashes out words
From deep desperation, crying on the floor, wanting life to be no more
I cry out to God, I scream out His name
I'm wanting Him to take away this pain
I'm torn between my flesh and the spirit that's inside
So many times I wish I could die
I know that God loves me and He wants the best for me
But, where is the God that says He will save me
Hindered by emotions and deafened by the lies
The eyes can not see between the sin-filled skies
False hope, unprecedented lies, destruction of a soul
Tender child of God shattered heart of wounded dreams
Passion dies within, surrounded by the darkness
Tunneled deep within
Looking upward finding a glimpse of light
That is dim
Searching for the light ever so dim
Grasping for anything that will show some type of love
Grabbing a hold ~ hanging on though torn
Loosing breath, swinging hard,
Fighting as had as thy strength can handle
Falling, screaming, having no hope
Loosing control ~ when does it end
Run girl run as fast as you can
Run to the Creator and take by the hand
Let it hold you, let it love you, let it take away the fear
You must surrender and render your heart near
Surrender child surrender broken to the core
Let go of the fear, stop hanging on this door
Seek out for the truth, cry out for its love
And know without a doubt its enduring touch.
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